Accepting Frustrations

I don’t know why my side bar has gone “hide-y” down at the end of my blog.
My posts are also looking messy, there doesn’t seem to be any linebreak or paragraph breaks. This is all very perplexing! And annoying.
No matter what I do, I can’t fix it. Maybe its time to try another template.

This is the latest on a mounting pile of things I am feeling frustrated and annoyed about.
Eckhart Tolle says that peace can only come in the letting go of wanting this moment to be different.
I drew an angel oracle card last night about something else I am frustrated with and the message was this:

Blessing In Disguise
“What appears to be a problem is actually part of your answered prayer.”

Seen from another angle, the universe is giving me lots of opportunity to practice acceptance which I now remember creating as a possibility as I was doing the New Earth Webminar. Sometimes ...LOL...taking responsibility for how my life is turning out is not as fun as I thought it would be.

Too much stuff

My shoulder is throbbing a little from hauling around a handbag that’s too heavy.
What I crammed in my bag today:

(Wallet and keys, Moleskin Diary, The Culture Code by Clotaire Rapaille, A small spiral bound which is a bag staple, my fashion mag scrapbook, gym gear sans shoes, Iphone (which was used to take this pic), spare headphone and adaptor, tissues, make-up bag, pens, crystal pouch with 4 crystals in it (the red velvet pouch in the pic), tear sheet from magazine which i took out during the day.

I switched from a huge bottomless bag to a much smaller one a few months ago to lighten the load, literally and metaphorically. I always have too much stuff, on me, around me, buying, collecting, hoarding, saving it for the elusive someday.

This is a picture of my old office many years ago.

I am now purging emotionally, physically thing anything that no longer serves to add quality or beauty to my life. I have received a lot of inspiration and support from a few sources online: check out unclutterer, Peter Walsh Design, oprah (where I discovered Peter Walsh). Itunes store also has some podcasts on organising which was pretty good. I also youtube-d "clutter and organise" got a few vids but i think Peter's show clips on Oprah.com is probably the best and easiest to follow.

I am really enjoying the lightness space creates. I am tear sheeting what feels like a million Lucky Magazine and home decor magazine. I scrapbook what i like, find inspiring, beautiful, whimsical and scrapbooking it is like creating a big juicy mag i can flick through over and over again with only the best bits.

Like a spider

I heard this from wayne dyer on a podcast the other day, who in turn got this from Lao Tze... (forgive my loose paraphrasing)…. Everything we need to learn about enlightment we can learn from a spider.

The spider weaves his beautiful web and then sits and wait for life to come to it. It doesn’t rush around to look for food. It trust that its mission… the beautiful web will bring to it what it needs. Isnt it a lovely analogy for life.

This came to me as I stood in creating flow in my life. I had a deep intuitive feel that my life lesson this year was to embrace whatever shows up and learn to flow with it. In the past, flow to me has always been about optimal condition and operating, creating magically in the zone.

Since the beginning of the year, I learnt to flow with upsets at home. I learnt to flow with criticisms at work. I learnt to flow with uncertainty. I learnt to create despite the lack of creative inspiration flowing. I flowed with work stress. I flowed with tiredness, feeling overstretched with the different projects I committed to. I flowed with not having things my way when my Chinese New Year holiday was not filled with fun or R&R but instead hospital and vet visits as well as a grumpy and sick husband. Like the spider, I learnt flow may not means movement. Flow can be found in stillness and acceptance despite the part of me that rages on and find action a comforting way to barge forward.

In doing so, I now realised flow is a matter of choice in attitude, in trusting life, in not trying to control everything. Flow is about staying light and limber around whatever shows up. Flow is mostly about what is going on inside.